In a seamless gesture, she tilts her head in my direction, allows her hair to shield her face from her date and says “Dewey” in clear, crisp syllables. Dewey is a Delaware beach town many Washingtonians head to for summer weekends. “Puma, puma, cougar in puma clothing,” he tells me. All are fairly slim and dressed in skirts and heels. I refuse to calculate how many hours of Zipcar time I’d need for that road trip. He’s in his 40s, married and a magnet for women of all ages.
It’s a long drive for someone who doesn’t own a car. “Perfect,” I tell my 40-year-old girlfriend and our 30-year-old male sidekick.
Conversation is an endless dodging of topics that would flag the age gap. Cougars don’t go out in the rain.” He wants to say more, but others walk up.
If you do, you’ve tipped your hand and lost the chance. “It won’t matter.” He fixes me with a steely gaze he’s learned from government jobs he can’t discuss unless he kills you, and tells me to strap on the big girl pants and make the approach. “It’s an experiment.” “I don’t like being a cougar,” my friend says. I’m going home.” “You’ve got to head to Adams-Morgan,” the man beside me says. ” A man whose few remaining hairs are a streaky mix of gray and white is standing nearby. He’s holding court in Russia House and dispensing wisdom while my Cougar Coach hits on two women who likely got in with fake IDs. “But you’ve got to go where the beer’s cheap and the night’s almost over.” -like scene. It’s as if he’s caught me at the Krispy Kreme with a dozen doughnuts. “If you want to pose as a cougar, paint your nails. To be the cougar who seeks out her cub for a night or a weekend, you can’t care too much about what people think. Beer costs less than five dollars a bottle and no cover is charged.
My fellow cougar-poser is inching toward the stairs. “Ask if the fire’s wood-burning or gas.” “That’s stupid,” I tell him. Within five minutes, we return to our Cougar Coach. “We didn’t want anything more to happen,” I remind him. I mean, let’s face it: who wouldn’t rather be with someone closer to their own age if they can before last call? It’s filled with bars no one over the age of 24 wants to enter, very cheap beer, even cheaper pizza by the slice just outside. “The cougar relationship is a beautiful thing,” the young guy next says. No one’s feelings are hurt.” The men around us nod. More than money or looks, information—about politics, refugees in war-torn countries and even the sex lives of others—is our currency. It’s still raining and the roof’s leaking so the bartender wears a rain slicker. “Do you get a lot of older women and younger men meeting here? “I’m working on a dispatch about whether or not we’ve got a cougar scene in DC.” “Sometimes, sure.” But I look around and realize that, for all the young men and women, we’re the oldest women in the bar. Maybe they’re in Dewey, waiting out the rain with an off-duty lifeguard.
Maybe they’ll be staggering home to fall into an inebriated sleep, paper by their side.
Within another hour, people will start buying the Sunday at Kramerbooks, down the hill in Dupont Circle.
Right is always a challenge, and that challenge often becomes even harder when you're dating over 50.
Trust us, interesting singles over 50 are out there, and you don't have to put up with the stench of a seedy nightclub at 2 a.m. All it takes is the right mind-set and a little strategy.
The users of the secret-sharing app, Whisper, have revealed their own experiences of being a cougar; recounting both the threat - or reality - of being dumped, and the joys of feeling sexy and 'in control'.'My cub left me...
I feel so Demi Moore,' a woman posted, in reference to Ms Moore's doomed relationship with fellow actor Ashton Kutcher, who was 15 years her junior when their eight-year relationship crumbled in 2011.
Unless both parties are a) very drunk, b) ready for sex, and c) able to ignore the watchful crowd around them, the center will not hold. If you’ve visited DC, you’ve probably noticed that we’re not overly fit or fashion-forward. We like talk and, if someone’s got enough time to keep their bodies too perfect, that person’s probably not talking, or thinking, enough.