Yes, it’s great when the universe provides a cute, attractive, successful, intuitive, funny, kind, emotionally available man at your doorstep.
These men online are either not serious or they’re deeply deluded about who they’ll wind up with. Incidentally, I read that book about finding a husband after 35. If asking out a woman is hard, it’s about a million times harder for a woman to ask a man out because we’re defying gender roles. It’s been a long time since I met a man I was really interested in.
And I’m not saying I wouldn’t do it again, but honestly, I haven’t been tempted in a long time. I’ve been reading your blog with great interest, Evan.
I’ve been in dire financial and career straits at other times.
Not surprisingly, now that my career as a dating coach is in order and my head is on straight, I’m more open to giving and receiving love. I couldn’t tell you, but I know there’s something there that you’re not seeing.
You seem to be more self-aware, in that you’re claiming to have an open mind about dating. But I think the greatest thing keeping single people single is that they don’t truly make an effort to change things. Are you telling your friends to set you up with single eligible guys?
They say they do, but they don’t really DO anything about pursuing love. This is the core metaphor driving my first book, and a guiding principle of my friend Rachel Greenwald’s book as well. Are you going to singles events – parties, trips, cruises – or at least doing activities that have single men in attendance? Have you signed up for a six-month subscription on a big dating site?
Shining the light on myself, I’ve definitely been too picky at times.
I’ve been difficult and argumentative at other times.
You may read this and think I’m a terrible date, but I’m self aware enough to know I’m not a disaster. I pursue things that interest me, and I’m friendly and open to meeting people who share those interests. I’m not sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring. Oh, and for the record, I did try asking men out when I was younger.